End of Choco Taco brings a pall on my Jersey Shore experience

When I heard, I called my wife. 

“I have bad news.” 

“Biden’s running again?” 

“Worse. They’re discontinuing Choco Tacos.” 

“What? No!”  

It took a moment for her to recover. Then she asked, “Why?” 

Some corporate financial move by Unilever, the world’s biggest soap maker, which owns Klondike, which makes Choco Tacos.  

“Apparently, Choco Tacos aren’t profitable, so they’re getting the ax. How is that even possible?” I said. “Figures, a soap company scrubbing its portfolio of one of their best things.” 

There was silence.  

“Well,” she said, “you only have them once a year. So they never made any money on you.” 

“We only eat turkey once a year,” I said, “and the meat packing industry isn’t discontinuing turkeys. And what about candy canes? Nobody eats them outside of Christmas, and they’re back on trees by the millions every year,” I said.